whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Randomize
