do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
