I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
