Can Purell be used as lube?
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
