You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
