Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Randomize
