Apparently you make a good broom.
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Duck Duck Cougar?
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Randomize
