I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
