I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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