I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
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