i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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