I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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