I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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