But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
don't judge my taste in strippers
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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