Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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