No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
