i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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