Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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