Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
