Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
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