at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
please come you make the beer taste better
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize
