Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
