How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Randomize
