I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
