drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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