the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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