I want to stick my p in your. b.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I have post one night stand depression
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