I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
