I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize
