guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
