cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
