There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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