Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
I'm eating all of the evidence.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
