She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
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