Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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