I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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