i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
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