before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
