dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Randomize
