she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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