Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
