I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
