you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
