Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
