I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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