it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Randomize