just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
