At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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