Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
