Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
